The Wisdom of 47 Years

 It appears today is my 47th birthday. I know this because my cabin is decorated with all kinds of birthday things and I spent about 4 minutes last night trying to do the math to figure out how old I am. 47. 

A few weeks ago, I was walking down a hallway in my house when all the sudden it hit me that I’m middle aged. What in the actual hell is going on? How did I not know this was coming on? Why was I shocked to realize it? Also- should I have a mid-life crisis? I can’t decide. 

Today is a beautiful sea day. We realized after taking our first 30+ day cruise that we LOVE sea days. The downtime is so important. You can’t go go go and somehow also soak it all in. You need processing time. So, I just spent the last 2 hours sitting on an open deck at the very back of the ship, sipping drinks and staring at the water. Bright blue sky and big white puffy clouds. It’s quiet in a way that’s unexpected for the open seas. People are talking more quietly, like in silent pre-agreed upon reverence for the joy of the moment. A perfect birthday morning.

Last night at dinner I was saying that I needed to think about the things I’ve learned this year. I always do that. Some years are more chock full of learnings, many of which are painful. That’s really how we learn the most, right? Some years are just sort of processing time. The calm between the go go go years. This year was go go go. 

When I look back on it, it feels far longer than a single year. It began with a bunch of unknowns at work- a re-org was coming. But when? And then sabbatical. Which was amazing and then tragic. And then back into the soup when the reorg really did happen. A new team. A new title. A new level. So much work. And then our renter moved out unexpectedly. And then a house sale that was dramatic and stressful and ugh. And then the harvests. And then some heart wrenching moments over the holidays. I remember feeling distinctly cheated at Christmas time because there was too much drama and stress and angst and then all the sudden it was Christmas and I hadn’t yet had time to sit with the joy and the wonder. To clear my heart, mind, and soul. I felt rushed and ill at ease. I felt like I didn’t get the expectation time. It was just gone before I could even have it.  

In a way, that’s the right ending for a year that was almost exactly that the whole 365 days. Too much all at once. Too fast, too hard, too stressful, too long waiting. Not enough time for the needed joy, the deep breaths, the downtime. A whirlwind year of mini tornados.

What’s interesting about times like these, which of course you only ever see in the rear view, is that all those tornados are clearing a path. A path you never knew you needed or that could even exist. I guess if I have any wisdom in these 47 years, it is that. I still don’t know what path has been open, but I can see it for what it is. And that means that this year will likely be a processing year. I’m here for it. 

One of the most traumatic and dramatic path clearing years I had included: moving across the country, buying a new house, starting a master’s program, my husband moving out and leaving, getting laid off, and trying to support a new mortgage, car payment, and graduate degree with a part time job making $15,000 a year. All that happened in 3 months time the summer of 2002. 

Do I know how to have a good time or what? I was the very ripe age of 26 that summer. You know how much wisdom a 26 year old has? Not enough. I needed my processing year- and boy did I have one.

Let’s not forget the year I started a new job, had 5 bosses in 5 months and then got a new role and boss and never worked harder in my life. Then, my man left me for the proverbial younger woman after a chess match of a year stringing me back and forth. I moved into a completely crappy apartment in a city where I had no friends or family. I spent hours every day walking because I didn’t want to sit in my apartment by myself. I was then 36. I had much more wisdom, but I needed a processing year. And, I got it.

Seems like these things are happening every 10 years. But this year, the tide has changed. The wisdom and the learnings are enough to ensure it. I still needed a path cleared- and I’m not sure why yet but I confident that it’s a good thing. My man is right by my side, where he belongs. Things are looking up- even when things are hard, we feel blessed. 

All that to say, I guess I’ve learned:

• If you hang on to things that don’t serve you well, eventually they’ll be ripped away. It doesn’t feel good at the time, but it’s necessary for your future happiness.
• No matter how hard you try, things will just keep right on changing. Don’t try to keep them the same. Change is helping you move down a path. 
• Be open to new friends. New friends let you be the new you you’re becoming. There is no expectation or judging. You’re just the you that you are every day. This is not to speak badly of old friends - who are so important. It’s just that at critical change moments, new friends seem to show up to escort you into your new self. It’s beautiful. Shout out to Sara! Sometimes you just need to live and breathe and think new thoughts without worry of people wondering who you are and why you’re doing what you’re doing.
• Do the stuff you said you wanted to do. There is no right time. There is no “bucket list”. There is no “maybe when…” Did you wake up today? There is today. 
• Release the stuff that bugs the sh!t out of you. Let it go. Drop it off. Run away from it. Don’t know how? Go get help. This is different for everyone, so I can’t tell you how. What works for me is deciding I don’t want whatever it is in my daily life anymore and then I get ruthless about getting away from it. This is a CHOICE you have to make every single day until it’s so normal you forget about it. We forget we have choices. We become slaves to things we don’t even like or want. As the Eagles song goes, “we live our lives in chains, and we never even know we have the key.” You don’t have to live like that. 
• Be nicer to people. Are there stupid people? Yes. Do they suck? They really do. Can you choose to still be a nice person? Absolutely you can. Should you waste your energy on them? No. Should you welcome them into your inner circles? No. But you can be polite. Civil. Kind. 
• Ask for what you want. Not in a rude way- don’t be that entitled person demanding everything you’ve ever wanted. But show up for yourself. Ask for what you want. Let people know what you’re working on and if there is a way they can help. This is not some one man show where we’re all working to be the last man standing. We’re built for community. You get to decide how big your community is and who is in it. Call on your people. Answer when they call on you. The things you want are likely attainable. Let people help you. 
• Praise people. Build them up. Maybe you’ll be the one nice thing they think of at the end of the day when they lay down to sleep. Maybe you’ll be the one thing they remember on the worst of days when it feels too hard to get out of bed. You’ll likely never know this. You have to do it with no expectation of thanks or glory. You do it because it’s right. You do it for the sole chance that you get to be the bright light today. What a gift- to be the light. BE THE LIGHT.
• Get out of your own damned head and get out of your tiny little circle. Broaden your world. Let people in. Stop being so ready to correct people. Stop being so determined for people to know you’re right. Be determined for people to know you care. Be determined for people to know you’ll listen. Be determined to admit you’re often dead wrong. If you don’t have a handful of friends who are nothing like you, go get some. Friends of different ages, colors, political views, education levels, monetary standing, countries of birth or current living situation. The best way to see how wrong you are about so many things, is to experience more of the world. And really, do you want to be so wrong about so many things? No, you don’t. 

Thanks for being a part of my circle for another year. I couldn’t have made it this far or be this happy without your love and friendship. Cheers to 47 years! 

Coming Face to Face with Dragan

 Guys.

For real.

The title happened this morning.

You will love this.

Now, if you don’t remember how we first met Dragan, go back and read the post on establishing the underground smuggling ring. But the gist of it is, Dragan is the one in the back office that helped connect the dots between Jason and James in Vines (and later Ginny) and everything we were trying to move through the underground into the quarantine cabin. The first of which was toothpaste shortly followed by wine. Which should always be the opposite order, BTW, but when one hasn’t brushed in 3 days, one no longer cares about things like logic and tastebuds. 

A few days ago, we discovered that Dragan was still on the Regal. And so it was going to be a matter of time before the glorious meeting would occur. Today was the day.

The gang met up around 9 in the Princess Live theater to get the scoop about being “in transit” tomorrow. This means we have the pleasure of being 6 of the 348 people who are staying on the ship for another cruise. We’re good at this - we did 3 back to back cruises last spring. You never know what the country of disembarkation/embarkation will require - hence the meeting to find out. By the way, the country in question this time is the US, which means the rules are stupid. We all have to get off. Wait an hour. Then get back on. If we don’t immediately get back on, then we have to wait until all the new people get on. You know. Logic. Whatever.

So, Ginny, Mike, Dianna and I are all sitting in the theater. Jason was ordering a coffee outside and who knows where Rich was. Jason comes in and whispers, “Dragan is here.” I gasp with the correct amount of appropriateness. I’m looking around. Jason whispers again, “He’s at the side door. I told him to wait for us. To meet you.” 

YESSSSSSSS!!!!

So, the moment comes. We walk out and there he is! I recognize him immediately because Jason said, “There he is.” Lol. Remember, I never saw him. But the second I heard his voice, I knew it was the man on the other end of the phone promising I’d get my toothpaste. And wine. 

So Jason said, “Ok, so you may not remember our story - but you are very famous in our lives and honestly, in the world.” Dragan cocks his head to one side, as though he’s trying to remember. Jason said, “Last spring, you helped us establish an underground smuggling ring…” and a big smile broke out.

Dragan said, “Let me see if I can remember. You tested positive and were in quarantine. Having a hard time…”

I said, “YES! And you made it possible for us to get things to each other.”

Then Ginny pipes up, “Yeah, and it really got good when Jason also went into quarantine and the New Mexican Mule had to step up - that’s me! I dropped the goods then.”

We all laughed and laughed. 

He was so happy to know we all came back.We were so happy to hear about his promotion (ahem!!) He’s now an officer on the boat. See kids? Forming an underground smuggling ring is a legitimate step in one’s career path. I say this with authority, of course, as a Director of Career Development. I know what’s up. 

We took a photo together. My hair is straight up Caribbean humidity whack but you can see how happy I am.

I really didn’t think I’d ever meet Dragan. Shoot, half the cruise last spring I was convinced he was merely an enigma. A ghost. A vapor? What’s cooler than those things? Whatever it is - that’s what he was.

What an absolute pleasure to get to tell him in person how much he meant to us! Thank the people that rock your world- you won’t always get a chance to later. 

Jose from Portugal (Joe-say)

 The other night, we were walking through the dining room with the gang. If you’ve done this on a cruise, you know that at times there are waiters and maitre des and chefs and random other people sometimes standing there as you pass by like a big welcome committee. This makes me think of Beauty and the Beast when they start the Be Our Guest song with, “The Dining Room proudly presents….your dinner!”

This particular night we were half way through the greetings when all the sudden a man yells to Jason, “Sir! Welcome back, Sir! So good to see you!!” Jason turned to see who it was and said, “JOSE!!” I turned and certainly recognized his face but wasn’t sure how those two were so connected. 

We got to the table and sat down. Jason said, “Babe! That was Jose!!” I said, yes, I recognize him….?

GET THIS. Jose was the man that Jason found in the dining room when I was about 20 hours into the clink and had yet to get any food. He said - I need your help. Jose said, “Yes, sir.” And from there, I was the only room in the clink getting food from the dining room. This is a big deal because unlike some other cruises, you cannot get dining room food delivered anywhere, including your room. The room service menu is completely different. Of course, in the clink days, I couldn’t get that either, hence the problem. 

It was a tiny glimmer of goodness in otherwise extremely miserable and long days. Because Jose listened and said, “I will help you.” He wasn’t the first person Jason asked. But he was the one who listened.

YAY for JOSE! 

So, what a delight to see him again. He was the main speaker at the grand wine tasting the other day. He was in the dining room last night. We see him everywhere. He comes right over to talk. He actually slipped us past the long line at the wine tasting. It’s great to make friends, right? 

He told a funny story and apparently common joke amongst the Portuguese and Spanish. He was teaching how you know if your wine is corked and a little bit about corks in general. He said, “Yeah, sure, you need to store the wine on its side at the right temperature. But also, if the cork is from Spain- it’s bad.”

Well. We happened to have brought a bottle of wine with us that we bought in Spain when Rich, Jason and I were all stuck there. (Side note- Mike and Dianna were also stuck but in another hotel) We opened it last night and as I was pulling the corkscrew out, the cork broke. I tried again. Broke again. Then a third time, which I’d never seen. Finally, it was out and we tasted it. Hmmm. Not so good.

Damn those Spanish corks. 

When we saw Jose at dinner last night we told him and he doubled over laughing. So good to see the crew laughing and having fun again! 

It’s Like Some Weird Version Of Dejavu

 You cannot understand how surreal it is to be on this ship again. Periodically, we see a crew member that was on board last spring with us. You get to know people you are with for 36 days. The other night, Ginny went to the front desk and discovered that Dragan is on ship! Dragan, who once helped establish the underground smuggling ring that allowed me to get toothpaste 3 days into the clink AND then made the bottles of wine appear every night. We still haven’t seen him- but it’s comforting knowing he’s here. I hope we can all see him and get a selfie. 

We’ve been slowly finding out that lots of crew have been promoted. Not to brag, but I’m pretty sure we helped with that. I mean, I wrote 5 paragraph essays on these people when we left. You know I am not kidding. I think I need a t-shirt that says something like, “Be my friend. I will get your promoted.” That seems to cut right to the chase. Our good buddy Ecer, who once burst open the time capsule and finally got our post cards shipped out was promoted and is now on the same ship as James! Dragan himself was promoted. Isn’t this great? Damn. I feel awesome about this.

So all that is good. But like I said, it is very surreal. One year ago, things were so different. We were still terrorized by COVID. There were masks and required tests and fear of quarantine or being refused a seat on the plane home. There was constantly changing rules in every country. 

And, there was a whole lot more quiet. More gratitude. More story telling. People were just thankful to be out. Thankful for us to come see their shops and buy cups of coffee. People just wanted to connect and be together again and we couldn’t quite yet freely do that. But even so, what we could do - just being on the ship and traveling again - was amazing. 

This feels a bit like the former life. Pre-pandemic. Where people are already forgetting their manners and their gratitude. Where they’d rather whine about slow service than be thrilled to be sitting on a gorgeous ship sailing perfectly calm seas. And maybe some of this is my own bias towards the stereotype of the loud, rude American…but damn. There are some loud, rude Americans on this trip! 

I find myself longing for the Regal of Spring 2022. The quiet spaces with people reading and sipping coffee. The beautiful, soft music. Less people in any given place. Good conversations.

It’s interesting because this is all juxtaposed with not having to worry about COVID. No masking. No testing. No new rules to try super hard to follow each stop so we don’t end up in the land clink. 

I guess I’m wondering - is it that we didn’t learn anything from these hideous last couple of years? Or is it that those years changed us- and not in all too flattering ways? Or am I just old now? Stuck in a nostalgia cycle of wishing to get back what’s long gone?

Now, don’t read this and think we’re not having a great time. We totally are! It’s SO fun to be back with Rich and Ginny and Mike and Dianna. The sea is calm and it’s warm this time, which is allowing us to spend far more time outside than we could last spring. 

I think, as always for me, I’m just processing all these thoughts and feelings that got stuck without quiet time and space to ponder. I always do my best thinking when I’m able to freely wander and do whatever I want during a day (as opposed to waking and being in a set routine at home). 

What I know for sure, though, is regardless of some of these yahoos on board, I am SO thankful. Eternally grateful for these moments and friendships. For being able to see the world, which is still lovely and thrilling. For chances to reclaim moments that didn’t go the way I wanted. It is like some weird version of dejavu where you’ve sorta been there before but it’s not quite the same!

The Regal Princess, Take Two

346 days ago, exactly, Jason and I stepped foot onto the Regal Princess in Fort Lauderdale, Florida for a 36 night journey across the Atlantic and through the Mediterranean. Immediately upon boarding, we found ourselves in a lovely wine bar called Vines. We had 2 gin and tonics that were made Thurman style- strong and with plenty of lime. Our bartender was a man named James.

If you’re a regular blog reader or even mildly know us, you remember how those 36 nights ended up going. And the 8 more we had to stay in Barcelona after disembarking.

Sometimes people ask me if I would do it again, knowing now how it ended. The answer is yes. Though it would hurt again and I sure would skip that last part again if I could.

Last summer, our friends from that cruise, Rich and Ginny, told us they were planning another cruise for their 55th anniversary and asked if we’d like to come along. Well, of course we would … if we could.

2022 continued to be a long, slow kick in the teeth but finally- right before Christmas, everything finally seemed to resolve. Grape harvest was done and barreled down. Olive harvest was done and barreled down. The Texas house sale concluded. All the money somehow worked. Hallelujah. Let’s Party. So, we called our favorite American Airlines Cruise planner to see if there was any way she could get us on the ship for Rich and Ginny’s cruise. Sadly, we learned Julie wasn’t there anymore but through some series of amazing luck (ahem- thank you, Lord!) suddenly we were signed up! 

And so, 3 days ago, we again boarded the Regal. We went straight to Vines for gin and tonics but sadly, James wasn’t there. We knew this- because we’ve stayed friends and we were delighted to hear he’d been promoted and moved to another ship. Yay for James. Sad for us. Know what? We were looking forward to seeing his smile. He wore a mask 100% of the time on the last trip. Crazy to think we talked to him every day and only ever saw his eyes!

But- waiting in Vines were Rich and Ginny and Mike and Dianna and it was an awesome reunion! We had a gin and tonic and then headed off up 7 flights of stairs to find our new cabin and get settled in.

There were 2 specific places I wanted to go to on the boat, other than Vines. Places I wanted to have a do-over moment at. One was E314- my quarantine cabin, which took 6 days of joy away from me. The other was the couch on the very back bar patio where I was sitting when they found me and told me I had to come into quarantine. I feel haunted by both spots and was very anxious to see them again and breathe a sigh of relief that this time wouldn’t be like that. And, hopefully, never again will I experience that.

Here we are at both! 

Random Tidbits

 Once we were at the hotel in Barcelona, Rich and Ginny came over to drink the wine we’d been wanting to share. Which turned out to be 5 bottles. Anyway, Ginny was telling us the story of when she took over for Jason when he went into the clink with me. She said, “I went up to James and told him Jason was now in the clink  and I was the man. James gave me the wine and then I went to the front desk and went up to Sylvia and said, “I’m working the underground now. I gotta get these bottles delivered.” I cannot stop laughing at this! “I’m working the underground now” and they knew what she meant and what to do!!! AMAZING. 

Shortly before we got off the boat, before Jason was in the clink but covid was already all the rage, he went to use the restroom down on the main piazza level (where most people hang out). He saw two grown men come out from the stalls of the bathroom, not wash their hands, and then walk directly to their tables where they continued eating and drinking their food. How is this still a thing in the year of our Lord 2022? Not even a covid thing, just a that is so dang gross thing. And generally, most people know to be more careful on cruises…but not all people.

Yesterday, I went down to the new Vines, aka the 1st floor patio at the Eurostar Grand Marina Hotel, and was walking to meet up with the crew for happy hour when a bartender ran up to me. 

“Miss?”

“Yes?”

“I’ve heard you didn’t pay for your bottle of wine yesterday.”

I just stand there looking at him. Is this real? What’s happening right now?

“Oh.”

“Would you like to pay?”

“I would like to pay, yes.”

Oh my word!!! So, we bought a bottle to start with and they brought it out to us on the patio along with the wine glasses. We then opened some of the bottles we bought and sat there for hours talking. By the time we went in, we brought all the bottles and glasses in but the woman who had brought the rose was long gone and clearly we weren’t thinking about that first bottle of rose. But, worse! We saw that lady who gave it to us at breakfast and lunch time and she didn’t say anything to us. ACK! So embarrassing. 

Breakfast is free here at the Eurostar Grand Marina. And man, is it awesome! Imagine all the things. A huge selection of fresh fruit, all the baked goods, eggs and all that, full salad bar, the best meat, cheese, and bread you’ve ever seen. Little baby bottles of olive oil. Fresh squeezed juices. Champagne, which is called Cava here. Holy cow. Oh- all the fresh made coffee drinks. So anyway, now I apparently eat salad for breakfast. With champagne. And a tiny little bite of cheesecake. And the world’s most amazing ham. A slice of manchego cheese. With a cappuccino. This is who I am now. A European! 

We’re enjoying the wine here still. One very interesting thing is that since Spanish wine is still new to us, we generally don’t know what anything is. So, we walk into a place and sit down. When the waiter comes up we say,” white wine” or “red wine” and they say ok and then a bottle arrives. In the US, the waiter would want to know exactly which one you want. Here, it’s like oh, a white wine. Cool. I’ll bring one. And if you’re a jaded American like me and reading this, you’re probably thinking - ha! I bet they bring you the most expensive thing on the menu. You would be wrong. 

The only bottle we’ve had yet that we haven’t liked (here in Spain) is this bottle of red we bought yesterday for all of 5 euros. Now, sure, that’s crazy cheap, but we bought 3 other bottles in the same price range and those were all good. This particular one was, unfortunately, sweet. And somehow also smelled like oregano. In sommelier, this means it was absolutely disgusting. 

Our, ahem, extended stay here in Spain means we really ought to be doing laundry. There is a laundry service here in the hotel but the prices are radically absurd. Literally 9 euros to wash pajamas. Whatever pajamas even is. 5 euros to wash a pair of underwear. A whole load of laundry would end up costing $75 bucks!! So, I did what anyone would do- I looked around at my options. Do I have a lot of shower gel or hand soap? Why, yes. Do I have a good sink? I mean, it’s decent. Do I have hot water? Yup. Also, just saying, I have a separate bidet. I know what you’re thinking but also this isn’t my first clothes washing in a bidet rodeo. Oh, no. I lived in Brazil for two summers and regularly washed my clothing…and not my booty…in the bidet. Shoot, at 17 years of age, I’d never seen a bidet and I sure wasn’t going to just attempt to wash my lady parts in there. Honestly, just looking at the thing, I couldn't even visualize how that would work. But, basically it is a basin with water and that’s really what you need to wash your clothes, so…whatever. I’m pro bidet these days, BTW, and if you need some counseling on it, I’m your gal. But those stand alone ones still freak me out. 

Anyway, so we’ve been washing some clothes. The washing isn’t bad but the drying stinks. We don’t really have anywhere to hang things to dry. We certainly have a lot of wind blowing in thanks to a lovely spring storm that popped up to help. Suffice it to say, washing a couple of t-shirts, socks and underwear is ok. Washing jeans and sweatshirts is not going to work. Ew. Never would have thought I’d miss doing laundry!!!

Moving the Clink: Misinformation meets Disinformation

 So, I woke up early on the last morning. Watched as the Regal Princess gently cruised into dock one last time. I love watching that. Never gets old. I ordered up one last flat white and just sat there quietly sipping. I will miss life at sea.

As the 8-9 am time range got close, my brain apparently died. I knew this was the time they would move the clink, but I was still unclear what I was supposed to do…being not in the clink. I decided to go ahead and clear out of my room at 8, because the paperwork that came to the regular rooms asked that we do that. I only had my backpack and one other small tote bag, so this was no big deal. I thought I’d go sit by the gangway, maybe have a breakfast cocktail, and wait until I saw Jason and then jump up and join him. 

This was going smoothly until Jason asked me if I was supposed to stay in my room. I was like I don’t know. He said they told you to. I said…they did? 

So, I was pulling up Crew Chat to ask if anyone knew or cared where I was when all the sudden, here comes Wendy and a boat officer! She said, “What are you doing?” I laughed. “Clearly, I have no idea what I’m doing!” She said, “Why did you leave without saying goodbye?” Awww.

Turns out, I was supposed to wait. Anyway, the officer took me to the clink and dropped me off with Jason. I mean, why not? I got to hug Wendy goodbye first and thank her for taking such great care of us.

Now together in the clink, we were doing what you always do, which is to say we were watching Bull and feeling despair. I thought about ordering that breakfast cocktail but I kept thinking they’d come get us any minute.

Around 9:15, we finally get a knock on the door. There are two dudes and a luggage cart. They cram all our stuff on the cart and take off walking fast. Finally one looks back at us, still standing in our doorway. Come on, he says with just a wave. 

Alright then.

We continue walking very quickly. It’s like they didn’t want any germs to fall off so the plan was GET OUT FAST. When we got to the main elevator area, there was an officer or crew member standing all around to make sure no healthy passenger who might still accidentally be on the boat could possibly interact with us. Not a bad idea!

Turns out there is a separate gangway for the sickos. Also not a bad idea. Had I continued to sit at the gangway on 6, I never would have seen Jason walk off. We very unceremoniously walked off. I stopped for a moment to look back and take a quick picture. It wasn’t a great picture, but I still wanted to capture the moment for some reason. Maybe it just didn’t feel right to rush right off leaving behind 36 days of insane memories without…any notice of it.

Once inside the terminal building, the most interesting thing happened. We were in a very large room with nothing in it except the clink people. They wheeled in the luggage cart- immediately inside the doors- unpacked it and left us standing there with everything. Ok. What now?

We assessed the situation. Everyone else was standing or sitting there with all their stuff. No one was moving or talking. The terminal of despair meets the clink. Good times. 

And then, just when you think things can’t get crazier - everything just went absolutely nuts. I’d say we’d been standing around for 30 minutes or so with literally no idea what was supposed to be happening when this lovely lady with a very unfortunately quiet voice attempted to address the giant terminal clink room.

“Hello,” she whispered to all of us and none of us at the same time. 

“Hello,” she tried again. This time sort of waving one hand in everyone’s general direction.

“Please come close and gather around.” 

Um, what?

Some random, very angry man yells, “We aren’t supposed to be close together.”

“Well, I don’t want to yell.”

There you have it. 

We all move in.

The first bomb drops.

“I am here to take you to the hotel. In the last couple of days, Spain has moved from pandemic to endemic. This means you don’t have to quarantine.”

What?

“The hotel doesn’t know that you have COVID. Please don’t tell them.”

Wait. What now? What happened to everything we’d been told about quarantining in the hotel, the doctor coming daily to test, the family advocate person that is supposed to check on us every day?

Now it’s her turn. “What? I don’t know about any of that.”

What?

I cannot express to you with all the words in all the languages I know the shock and awe and confusion going on. 

On the one hand - wait. We don’t have to be quarantined? We can…go and do whatever we want?

On the other hand- what do you mean you don’t know about any of the stuff we were told was going to happen?

This poor lady. Her entire job was just to get us to the hotels. But I’ll tell you one thing right now, if you think a large group of bitter and angry old people are going to handle this total lack of communication and mixed messaging well…you would be very wrong. 

As they say, the shit was hitting the fan.

So, people start yelling out things. Questions. Random “facts”. Things they’ve heard. I mean, it was a disaster. The poor lady pretty quickly realized this was not going to end well and called…someone. I really wonder who. People started doing the thing they do where they don’t care that 50 other people just want to go to the hotel, they are going to hold everyone up while they ask an extremely specific question to the very wrong person. Does the lady who just needs to get us on a bus to the hotel know about your letter from your doctor? I’ll bet you ALL THE MONEY IN THE WHOLE WORLD she does not. And, she will not. Also, would you please just be quiet and let us move on? No. No, they will not be quiet.

The cool people pretty quickly found each other. There were like…5 of us. Two were a younger couple from Washington State. And guess what? Her dad was the guy directing traffic in the hallway outside the medical center that I met when I went to get my paperwork. Ha! Full circle again!

Finally, we were able to move forward with going to the hotel. Our beleaguered lady says, “I need 30 people on the first bus.”

Lady. You are killing me. You’ve clearly never tried to move large amounts of people. This is a science. I happen to excel at it which is English for me feeling exceedingly judgemental. 

Finally she decided to call out the names of 15 couples. Aha! Brilliant! But then the humans decided to human and we were stuck again. She called this one couple and they didn’t want to go on that bus. They wanted to stay till the second bus because they wanted to go with their friends. I mean - are you serious right now? This is literally a 4 minute ride. But, our lady was like ok fine. And then, inexplicably, about one minute later the declining couple decided they were going on that bus and so were their friends. So they all got up to get in line. Never mind that additional people had already been called. Which meant there were not enough seats on the bus now.

We stood in the back watching this and thinking, “Man, this just keeps getting better.” It always pays to stay chill and not be in a hurry.

Oh, and I forgot this gem- the people who changed their minds and went ahead to get on the bus anyway couldn’t carry their own luggage. They walked up to poor lady person and were like, “Who is going to carry our luggage?” She said, “You are.” Wrong answer. Oh, they were mad. Stomped off yelling. I realize they packed more than they could carry, but this poor lady is not a luggage porter. It’s really not her fault or her problem. 

So, we finally get on our bus. There were only 10 of us on it. We drive the amazing 4 minutes to the hotel and everyone gets off and gathers their luggage. As we start to walk in, a nice guy from the first bus lets us know that there are something like 50 people in line to check in so we might as well get comfy and wait a bit. Fine with us. We’re tired of being near this rude and cranky crowd. 

We took turns manning the luggage (Chilean pickpockets!) and wandering off to see what was around. There was a little coffee shop right next door that looked cool but we had no idea if it was open. This is something that seems normal in Europe. No hours posted. No way to really just look at it and tell. It’s confusing!

Finally, the line moved enough that we got in and before too long we had checked in and dropped our bags off. No rooms would be ready till 3. It was around noon at that point. I was really regretting that I hadn’t eaten breakfast or taken a shower. This is not how I thought the day would go. I actually thought Princess would have handled everything at the hotel and someone would just hand us our keys and we’d walk right into our quarantine rooms. Instead, we were unleashed in Barcelona with hours to kill and lots of COVID to spread. Good times.

We wandered around looking for a restaurant that wasn’t crowded because Jason was really worried about giving anyone COVID. We found one and got a table with lots of distance and got some food ordered. It was nice being able to just sit and linger there. We got back to the hotel around 4 and went to get our keys and our room still wasn’t ready. Man. We kept our spirits up and stayed gracious which was such a joy to the front desk clerk that she gave us free drink coupons for the bar. Score! So, we wandered up to the bar and had a great glass of rose while we continued to wait.

Finally, we were in our room. I’m guessing it was 5 by then. Remember how the day began…with me up early watching the boat dock. I felt like I’d lived an entire lifetime in those 12 hours. 

Now, we were told when we booked the cruise that if we got sick or tested positive, Princess would handle everything and pay for everything. This was the comfort we needed to book. We’d already learned they weren’t necessarily handling everything- at least not that we could tell. And now we were starting to be curious about the payment. They said they would pay for the quarantine hotel. Cool. Except we have to pay for it first and then submit for reimbursement. Thankfully, we can do this. But, what if we couldn't? What if our resources were tapped? What if we didn’t have a credit card to place a 10 day hotel stay on? I asked that question to guest services. He said, ‘I don’t know what to say.” Um. Ok. 

So, we’re currently being told that Princess will reimburse us for the hotel and give each of us $100 euros in a per diem for food. Possibly they will cover other expenses, too, like things needed at the pharmacy, rides to the airport, etc. I certainly hope this is true because I know a lot of really pissed off people.

Jason reached out to the family advocate person as soon as we got in the room. It’s disconcerting that no one seems to be aware of what Princess told us. We really just wanted to verify that the doctor was coming to test everyone every day. Turns out, no. No he is not. No one knew about this at all. Jason pressed it a bit and our ‘advocate’ let us know that she would get back to us Tuesday (we asked on Saturday) because of Easter Sunday and Easter Monday. I didn’t know there was an Easter Monday, but there is here. We said ok but we need that test on Tuesday so we know if we can fly on Wednesday. Spoiler alert. It’s Tuesday now as I type this. 4:30 PM. No one has tested anyone and no one has replied. I’m not sure our advocate is earning her title.

Meantime, we bought some rapid tests at the local pharmacy and have been testing Jason daily. These aren’t good enough tests for the airline to accept, but we figure as soon as he flips to negative, we will take a good test. Those are much more expensive so we don’t want to take those daily. 

Now, most of the mad clink people are in our hotel. Not all- they had to spread the joy around a little. But we keep running into them. I’d be perfectly fine for us to ignore each other. At a bare minimum, I’d be GREAT with not walking up to each other and loudly discussing how everyone has COVID. But can we live like this? We cannot. There are 2 couples in particular…when I see them I keep trying to somehow fall into the earth. It hasn’t worked yet. They stroll up, “HOW’S IT GOING/ STILL TESTING POSITIVE?” while not wearing their masks…and while they themselves are still testing positive. Hey, why not just get on the loud speaker and inform everyone in Barcelona that we have a contagious virus?

Listen, I get that people are tired of COVID and tired of masks and all that. I am, too. But when you know you actively have it, I just can’t see not trying to take a precaution to help others. Just like you would any time you are sick with anything. 

You cannot believe the things we’ve seen.

• People who 100% have COVID removing their masks to sneeze. 

• People sneezing without covering their mouths at all

• One man removed his mask, sneezed into the open, and then yelled out, “You know what they say, if you’ve got it, spread it!” I wanted to punch him in the face then and I honestly think that’s about the time I got COVID (the timing fits) so now I REALLY want to punch him.

• People with COVID who wander around with no masks or not trying to even avoid being close to people. No effort at all. 

• People removing their masks to cough - and turning TOWARDS people while they cough. A lady did that to me yesterday. I know she has COVID because she was in the clink. She turned toward me, removed her mask, and violently coughed. I glared at her while taking very large steps backwards.

• I don’t even care what you believe anymore. I don’t care what you are tired of. I don’t care how you feel- whether you are sick or have symptoms. All I care about is your ability to not just be a flaming jerk wad.

The rumor mill continues to go crazy. No one knows the same things. There is no consistent message. Princess seems to have sailed off and that’s just it. It’s very disappointing and confusing. Did they mean the things they said but just didn’t quite have it all figured out? We keep saying they had 2 years to plan for this. When they started working the plan, it was clear early on it wasn’t working. Was there no plan B? Was there no person nominated to decide when to move to plan B? Was there no communication plan? Hard to say.

So, with Spain treating COVID as an endemic, we are all free to go and do whatever we’d like and most people are actually feeling pretty good. The worst of it seems to be feeling like you’ve got a head cold, which you treat with a decongestant and then you get the dry cough. That’s not awesome, but we’ve all dealt with that type of thing our entire lives. It’s fine.

Meantime, Covid continues to take more prisoners. Seems like in all our friends, at least 1 person in the couple currently is testing positive. This is creating a lot of interesting decision points. Should the person testing negative go ahead and take the flight home? If not and they stay, they might flip to positive and then further extend the time they both have to stay here before the airlines will allow them to travel again. If one goes home, the other is left to fend for themselves. That’s really crappy and lonely. There’s no real good answer here. Right now, we’ve got friends who have decided both ways and we’re all just looking out for each other. 

Jason hit his important day 6 for testing yesterday. A negative would allow us to make our regularly scheduled flight home. He was still positive. 

Poop.

But, it’s not all bad. We’re making the best of it. We’re meeting up for meals and happy hour. Sharing walks to the pharmacy. Renaming the patio to “Vines” so we can pretend to be on the ship- knowing James is out there somewhere making the good drinks. It’s supposed to rain all day today and tomorrow and then a reprieve on Friday, so if everyone continues to feel better we are going to take a trip up to see Montserrat. That’s giving us all something to look forward to! We might still ride the hop on hop off bus today or tomorrow- we’ll sit in the inside/covered area to stay away from people and to stay dry.